Friday, November 12, 2010

downtown brown

When I was a kid, my Big Dream was to be an explorer in the jungles of Africa. What that involves, specifically, I have no idea. That thought evolved into a desire to study animals. I wanted to be a "naturalist," whatever that means. By age 8 or 9, I had it sorted - I wanted to be a Marine Biologist. Pretty specific. I guess it's because we used to camp along the Pacific Coast, from BC to Oregon, and I spent hundreds of hours studying all the creatures in the tidal pools along the rocky coast.

Twenty-seven years later, here I am living in a giant temperate rainforest, with giant old-growth cedars towering above me, ravens chuckling in the canopy, and moisture dripping off the salal. I live in a northern jungle. Dreams come true.

Every day I walk along the rocky beach, still studying tidal pools, watching the birds, learning the habits of seals and otters. I'm a hobby marine-biologist. Fuckin' A.

I've always had dreams and goals in my life, and I'm always stunned at how quickly those dreams come to fruition, once I actually have the courage to be specific and say "I want to do this" to a tangible idea.

My last Big Dream was to "Be Able to Support Myself From my Art While Living in Cabin in the Bush." Pretty specific - I thought it was going to take a lifetime to happen. Five or six years later, I did it. And I'm doing it again. It's nice. But I need something else to work towards - I can't be finished yet!

I have some big abstract dreams about what kind of person I want to be in my old age, but for the past 1-2 years I haven't been able to figure out the Next Big Dream.

I've known that the Next Big Dream must involve:

- Wilderness / Animals
- Art
- Sharing with / serving others

Too general though. I need something specific that I can visualize and plan toward. (That's the kind of guy I am).

Yesterday, after hundreds of days of wandering and wondering, The Dream came to me. But it's too fresh and precious to share quite yet. One day, though, you'll see.

Exciting shit, people. Exciting shit.

1 comment:

  1. This is a very brave post. I've typed and deleted, then typed and deleted, then re-typed, reformatted, re-edited, then deleted many times; my feelings that summarize into two words: hells' ya!

    -Hazel (still signed under Harlene's profile)